# Conversation and Fun > Just Conversation >  But Honey I thought you wanted this present*...

## Uncle Fester

Confession time.

In the spirit of the season and because I think this could get funny if all you guys are open and honest let's confess some of the presents we've given the significant other that in hindsight maybeeee we shouldn't have.

I'll start: The Light of my life when we first married said she'd clean the bathroom more if only she didn't have to scrub so hard. Lo and behold like Providencial  intervention  a few days later I'm out Christmas shopping and there is this prepackaged "Deluxe" battery powered bathroom cleaning kit with multiple attachments to make all bathroom cleaning "scrub free"! Done deal
















then I saw her face when she opened it:hammer:

That was over 20 years ago and we're still married believe it or not. But wait. There's more:o (our species are slow learners) but before I confess more I need to see some other honest Neanderthals like me   post their well intentioned gift giving disasters first.

*rbaker's ficticious snowshovel gift and comment of a lack of optiboarders sense of humor is this threads inspiration.

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## Judy Canty

One year I got a pocket knife.  Granted, it was really nice, but it was...a POCKETKNIFE!!!  I'm thinking jewelry...he's thinking really pretty weapon.

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## chip anderson

Been hinting that she needs a nice 380 this is Jackson, MS after all.  But she won't go for it.  Had hoped to put the gun over a braclet.

Last year I go her a diamond ring, but my son-in-law and I packaged it in nine progressively smaller boxes.  In the next to last box I had a 20" gold tow chain  (about 10 lb., so I told her in advance it was a gold chain.

Have some fun with this , you live only once!

Chip

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## rbaker

I am going to refrain from replying to this post until after the holidays. 

I will, however, direct you to an earlier post on mine that may be appropriate here:

http://www.optiboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=15670
.

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## Fezz

> One year I got a pocket knife.  Granted, it was really nice, but it was...a POCKETKNIFE!!!  I'm thinking jewelry...he's thinking really pretty weapon.



Did you whittle him a "Thanks Alot Pal" thank you card made of red oak(and clobber him with it!)?


:D:cheers::shiner::cheers: :cry: :cheers::D

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## Grubendol

I'm a hopeless romantic as well as being a bleeding heart liberal, so I honestly can say I can't think of anything I've done that was that wrong, but I will say that the commercials that have been running this holiday season for Lowe's with a guy shopping for his wife at a Home Improvement store have me scratching my head.

The ad suggests this is actually a good idea.   Are they trying to make husbands sleep on the couch?!?!

*final note, for this season I have gotten my wife two necklaces from my favorite online store to save your marriage, bluenile.com  No sales tax free fed ex and stunning jewelry.  She's a fanatical baker and obsessed with Nigella Lawson currently, so I also got her some of Nigella's cooking gear.

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## For-Life

Pfft, I know that every single one of you give your loved ones a pair of glasses for xmas.  We all know that is the greatest gift of all.

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## DragonLensmanWV

I, of course, always buy the perfect gift for my wife, so I have no direct stories to tell,:D
BUT...
last year my wife's brother gave her a.....stud finder.
Of course, it works perfectly when I hold it to my chest and it beeps furiously and points at me, but somehow my wife is not convinced.....

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## Judy Canty

> Did you whittle him a "Thanks Alot Pal" thank you card made of red oak(and clobber him with it!)?
> 
> 
> :D:cheers::shiner::cheers::cheers::D


Thought about it...but I know he meant well. I've resigned myself to having him ignore my requests and get what he wants to get...knives, pens that are too pretty to actually use...:o Sometimes, he gets it just right...a Rolex, an iPod..:D  I just never know...

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## k12311997

> I am going to refrain from replying to this post until after the holidays. 
> 
> I will, however, direct you to an earlier post on mine that may be appropriate here:
> 
> http://www.optiboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=15670
> .


but did she like the gift?

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## chip anderson

Our shopping center has a jewelry store.  My wife "shops" there troughout the year.   They keep a list of what she likes.  I just go buy whenever whatever occasion occurs and pick out from the list what I think I can afford and the occasion merits.
Of course, I have the wife do all the shopping for everybody else, so I am pretty much off the hook for most situations.

Chip

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## obxeyeguy

I don't after 30 years, this year, have any real goofs.  We go to the carribean every winter and shop in St. Thomas.  This year, I got a "free" travel bag, 3 heinikins in the store(while she looks), an embroidered gulf shirt, and 2 more beers to go.  They also sent me Christmas card.  Maybe 
she overdid it, but heck, it was our 30 year anniv.  Look at the new(jeweler) friend I have.;)

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## cocoisland58

> I'm a hopeless romantic as well as being a bleeding heart liberal, so I honestly can say I can't think of anything I've done that was that wrong, but I will say that the commercials that have been running this holiday season for Lowe's with a guy shopping for his wife at a Home Improvement store have me scratching my head.
> 
> The ad suggests this is actually a good idea. Are they trying to make husbands sleep on the couch?!?!
> 
> *final note, for this season I have gotten my wife two necklaces from my favorite online store to save your marriage, bluenile.com No sales tax free fed ex and stunning jewelry. She's a fanatical baker and obsessed with Nigella Lawson currently, so I also got her some of Nigella's cooking gear.


This year I would love a gift card from Lowe's as I want to remodel the kitchen and bath.  You would think the amount of Kitchen and Bath magazines lying around the house would be a tip-off but I doubt it. In fact he put a "Merry Christmas" tag on the vacuum I got in August so perhaps I should expect nothing. If asked, I always say that anything appraisable is welcome. He hates to shop but will buy me anything I want when we are out together during the year.  I can't complain, or can I?

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## Bill West

Some of the "perfect" gifts I gave my wife over the years.

Riding Lawn Mower - beats pushing

Weedeater - handle was just her size

Chainsaw - she loves wood heat

Sledge and wedge to split wood - easier to carry

Post hole diggers - she needed a dog lot

Nice heavy leather gloves - keeps her hands smooth to rub my back

Love that gal and she's a great cook too so I bought her FOUR crock pots

:cheers:

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## Fezz

> Some of the "perfect" gifts I gave my wife over the years.
> 
> Riding Lawn Mower - beats pushing
> 
> Weedeater - handle was just her size
> 
> Chainsaw - she loves wood heat
> 
> Sledge and wedge to split wood - easier to carry
> ...




She sounds like she could use a kegerator and a new handgun or two!

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## Cindy K

My hubby is the most thoughtful gift giver i've ever met- its my mother who fails to think through her presents. Stellar example- she once gave me a ladies household tool kit with the central theme of hanging things; the main component was a particularly nice stud finder. Great, considering we have a log home!:hammer:

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## Judy Canty

Well, I must say that the boy done good this year...no weapons, no beautiful but essentially useless writing instruments. He remembered that I asked for a necklace from Lunch at the Ritz! :bbg:


(Ladies...see some really, really over the top jewelry at www.lunchattheritz.com)

Why am I thinking that next year will be a very tasteful Bowie knife?  :Eek:

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## Fezz

> Why am I thinking that next year will be a very tasteful Bowie knife?



I can only hope that it will have a diamond and sapphire encrusted handle!

;)

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## Diane

> Well, I must say that the boy done good this year...no weapons, no beautiful but essentially useless writing instruments. He remembered that I asked for a necklace from Lunch at the Ritz! :bbg:
> 
> 
> (Ladies...see some really, really over the top jewelry at www.lunchattheritz.com)
> 
> Why am I thinking that next year will be a very tasteful Bowie knife?


WOW... and which one did Keith get you?

Diane

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## Judy Canty

He got the medium gold necklace to hold either of the two pins I've had for several years. I have the Jungle Kin pin and matching earrings and the First Class pin and matching earrings. The only problem with the earrings is that they're noisy and you can't even get the phone to your ear! But I love the over the top look.

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## FullCircle

> Well, I must say that the boy done good this year...no weapons, no beautiful but essentially useless writing instruments. He remembered that I asked for a necklace from Lunch at the Ritz! :bbg:
> 
> 
> (Ladies...see some really, really over the top jewelry at www.lunchattheritz.com)
> 
> Why am I thinking that next year will be a very tasteful Bowie knife?


wow. That's over the top.  Reminds me of some of the Kirks Folly stuff I've seen on eBay

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## Dave Nelson

OK I pulled a good one this year... I open a Michael Buble' CD from my wife.
"A Michael Buble' CD?" I say. "I'm not really a fan, but I guess it will make good background music."
My wife seems upset with my lack of enthusiasm for Mr Buble' so I lose all pretense, and inform my wife, politly, that I probably will never listen to the disc, but maybe she can.  I figure a 20 buck disc is no great loss, until I open the disc and find 2 $125 tickets to a Michael Buble concert in Vancouver. 
To put it into perspective, If I were given a free pair of tickets by a friend, I would turn them down. Now, not only do I have to go, our bank account is $250 lighter for the privelege. 
This is, hands down, the worst gift I ever got.  :cry:

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## Grubendol

That sucks, I like Buble.

I was very happy with my wife's work this year.  She got me the Top Ten Pittsburgh Penguins games on DVD, a Pittsburgh Penguins thermal, and a set of Pittsburgh Penguins clothes for the baby due in March.

Also, lots of good books type stuff from other relatives.

Here are the necklaces I got my wife, btw.

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## chip anderson

No diamonds?

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## Grubendol

She has a thing for pearls, and besides that, we're quite poor right now with the baby coming and all.

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## Jubilee

I think the worst was when I was a freshman in college. Came home for Christmas and over the holidays had my knee operated on. So my only real option with all the lovely bandaging, bracing, etc, was to wear sweats. So I wake up Christmas Eve morning to my mom handing me a brown Target bag full of 6 different sweat suits...

Gee Thanks mom.. what I always wanted....

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## 1968

> I, of course, always buy the perfect gift for my wife, so I have no direct stories to tell,:D
> BUT...
> last year my wife's brother gave her a.....*stud finder*.
> Of course, it works perfectly when I hold it to my chest and it beeps furiously and points at me, but somehow my wife is not convinced.....





> My hubby is the most thoughtful gift giver i've ever met- its my mother who fails to think through her presents. Stellar example- she once gave me a ladies household tool kit with the central theme of hanging things; the main component was a particularly nice *stud finder*. Great, considering we have a log home!:hammer:


What is this with giving women stud finders?! *laughs* What happened to knocking on the wall?

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## optigrrl

> My hubby is the most thoughtful gift giver i've ever met- its my mother who fails to think through her presents. Stellar example- she once gave me a ladies household tool kit with the central theme of hanging things; the main component was a particularly nice stud finder. Great, considering we have a log home!:hammer:


Hehe - 

My dad re-gifted the gift I gave him the year before - back to me! Guess we were both guilty!

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## Cindy K

> OK I pulled a good one this year... I open a Michael Buble' CD from my wife.
> "A Michael Buble' CD?" I say. "I'm not really a fan, but I guess it will make good background music."
> My wife seems upset with my lack of enthusiasm for Mr Buble' so I lose all pretense, and inform my wife, politly, that I probably will never listen to the disc, but maybe she can. I figure a 20 buck disc is no great loss, until I open the disc and find 2 $125 tickets to a Michael Buble concert in Vancouver. 
> To put it into perspective, If I were given a free pair of tickets by a friend, I would turn them down. Now, not only do I have to go, our bank account is $250 lighter for the privelege. 
> This is, hands down, the worst gift I ever got.


WOW! That one tops an electronic programable thermostat, doesn't it!:D




> What is this with giving women stud finders?! *laughs* What happened to knocking on the wall?


Since my mother never learned the difference in sound between a stud and an empty space between the studs, she figures nobody else can either.:hammer:

Today I exchanged the countertop convection oven Ma gave me (still can't figure how anyone could consider a convection oven the same as a toaster oven) for a beeeeautiful new Krups pump driven espresso machine, on sale for half price!!!!! And, with the balance of credit I had left over hubby found a heavy duty portable trunk size air compressor, and I found meself some kitchen accessories. What a haul!!!!!!!!!!!!

My present from hubby was a KitchenAid stand mixer (ooooooh feel the power!). Hubby, on the other hand, no longer receives birthday, anniversary, or Xmas gifts - the deal was and still stands: the purchase of a 2007 Harley UltraClassic earlier this year absolves me from any further gifting for the next several years. :Rolleyes:

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## HarryChiling

> My present from hubby was a KitchenAid stand mixer (ooooooh feel the power!). Hubby, on the other hand, no longer receives birthday, anniversary, or Xmas gifts - *the deal was and still stands: the purchase of a 2007 Harley UltraClassic earlier this year absolves me from any further gifting for the next several years*.


I will give you my wifes number and you can call her and give her this great gift idea, please.

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## Cindy K

> I will give you my wifes number and you can call her and give her this great gift idea, please.


Anytime, Harry, anytime:D

And, I'll strongly suggest to her that she grant you the privledge of turning your sunroom into the 'bike room'. Heck, why should I be the only wife on the planet who allows a thousand pounds of rolling death machine to be parked as the centerpiece in a room that could be home to twenty foot tropical plants?

Aren't I a good wifey?

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## optigrrl

> Anytime, Harry, anytime:D
> 
> And, I'll strongly suggest to her that she grant you the privledge of turning your sunroom into the 'bike room'. Heck, why should I be the only wife on the planet who allows a thousand pounds of rolling death machine to be parked as the centerpiece in a room that could be home to twenty foot tropical plants?
> 
> Aren't I a good wifey?


 
"Git her before she makes the rest of us look bad!"

I'm not married but why raise the bar for a single gal, huh?

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## tmorse

> My present from hubby was a KitchenAid stand mixer (ooooooh feel the power!). Hubby, on the other hand, no longer receives birthday, anniversary, or Xmas gifts - the deal was and still stands: the purchase of a 2007 Harley UltraClassic earlier this year absolves me from any further gifting for the next several years.


Nice gift... 

Question?  How do you get all that hair in a helmet?:D

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## FullCircle

> the purchase of a 2007 Harley UltraClassic earlier this year absolves me from any further gifting for the next several years


Ha!  We've got the same agreement! 

And he wasn't allowed to park it in the house. We built a new garage for it, well, until a Saab took it (the bike) out.

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## Dave Nelson

Ok now if I could just find someone willing to trade a Harley for 2 tickets to Buble...

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## DeborahL

My hubby is not a shopper or thinker when it comes to gifting.  He is known for shopping at 4pm on Christmas Eve.  He claims he gets the best service and it's easier to see what's available as the stores are empty.

The one that tops the charts is...
24 pair of panties from Victoria Secret.  All cotton, different cuts, different colors.  It was nuts!  Over 50&#37; of them didn't fit my body type even tho they were the right size.  I'm guessing the sales girl was cute and on commission.

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## ERFLORIDA

> I am going to refrain from replying to this post until after the holidays. 
> 
> I will, however, direct you to an earlier post on mine that may be appropriate here:
> 
> http://www.optiboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=15670
> .


That was hilarious.  I have not laughed that hard in a while.  Thanks for you're entertainment.  :bbg::bbg::bbg:

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